It's not so bad, is it?
"..uh.. funny you should ask..."
"Uh-oh, where'd you find it??"
"Umm.. I found it.. on the street... "
"In the gutter??!"
"No! On the pavement... outside J&M's... about 4am on Sunday morning."
"DID YOU CLEAN IT?"
"Duh, of course I cleaned it."
Found object: very pretty star earring on long chain
Found where: on the pavement outside J&M's, late-night fast food joint, MSG a speciality
Found when: circa 3:30am Sunday morning
I'm quite pleased with it, actually. I only got my ears pierced (in the conventional sense) about two months ago, and I've been wondering where on earth one acquires earrings from. Now I know. Eyes to the floor, people.